arguments

been havin arguments. started on wed wen we ad-hoc decided to meet, then decided to go ikea to discuss digio dates. had sent dear the proposed dates the nite b4, since had mentioned tt need to book dates for some time already. dear said since i got so many criterias i shld go propose dates n he jus choose fm the dates. which led to my email on tue nite.

since it was ad-hoc, he din print the email so we din hav anythin to discuss with. he started the conversation with a date tt is nt in the list, 7 days away, bcos he is on early shift tt day thus can save a day of leave. he did reply my email with tis date, bt as i was on course, i din access my emails.

then i started grumblin abt y he made me cm up with a list wen its nt refered to, cos i felt v unappreciated. n oso cos wen i did the list, i dun even noe hw to eliminate dates, so i jus chose mondays n fridays. then the whole thing escalated, cos he felt tt it shld b a discussion, so dates outside the list is acceptable. so the usual comments abt poor tone, attitude, tone, volume etc came up. guess wat - i spilled the drink on myself. n he jus sat there, smilin n playin with his ring. i retorted 'ya, jus go ahead sit there n play with your ring'. n he continued smiling. i stood up, n went to look for paper tissues. FURIOUS. cant he do smting? wen i walked back, he wasn even lookin over his shoulder or checkin on me.

i packed up my things into my bag. he asked 'r u gg to toilet?'. i said 'no, i'm leavin'. took my bag n walked away. he caught up at the bridge n we walked to Home-fix (bcos i had mentioned earlier tt we need to get paint colour samples). all the while he din say anythin to me. i said sparse statements abt paint n floorin n we left.

walkin hm, i cant take it n asked 'u hav nothin to say?'. he gave me face n said 'wat abt u? u walked off n until now did nt say anythin.' HUH!??! so we argued argued n wen we reached the rd, we stopped walking (he was nt gg to send me hm, as an agreement incentive to go ikea discuss) n continued arguing. at a pt, he walked inside, to the grass patch. i wasn hapi tt he jus turned off lk tt, so i made a face. he saw it n wasn hapi. i was lk 'nvm. so move in, ok i move in'. wen i walked in, he walked off n crossed the rd. i shouted back at him n he con't walkin off to his bus-stop. (?!?!??!?!?!?!!!!!??!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

i called him on hp, he say he got tell me he is gg off. its jus i din hear it. he din hear me shouting back at him. he's nt gg to turn back n cont talkin cos he is v du lan.

so the phone conversation con't until i was home. until he was hm. then he decided to stop there. to go bathe, eat etc n talk later at 1030.

1030 i sms him, tellin to meet online instead. cont abt the dates n the argument. wen he cant take it n wana slp, he rushed me. so i wrap up the issue. then he say gd nite. then i cont talkin. then he said bye n jus left the conversation. ?!??!?!?!?!??!!?!!!! he walked out on me a second time. sent him sms bt he no reply. i knew he went to slp already.

since there is no closure on the matter, the mood today was stil off. plus he was v busy at work n got issue fm a mistake he made yest, it was worse. wats worse was i forgot to call digio to book the dates so called him on my way hm to call instead. he was nappin. so he called then i wanted to change the dates tt he arranged, so there was even more tension. plus, his mum overheard him calling digio n started complainin abt the coat agn. he snapped n shouted back.

resultin in him nt wantin to talk, n me questionin.

sigh.

we r gg to talk abt the mum ting n the hse ting tom. already v SIAN now with the argument hangover. there is no closure, makin it even worse. hw can things move forward? feelin v down now. wen i tink back on wed, i wonder hw he can do those tings tt make me feel hurt.